Occasional Affirmation

If you have any friends, most likely

they just don't know you well enough yet.

Once they get to know you and figure out

how much of a basket case you are,

they'll be gone in a second.

Once in a lifetime

Well, I got up at 2am this morning to celebrate? an oddity. Let me tell you I did think of this myself. Heard it on the news. So at 02:03:04 on o5-o6-o7 I stood outside on my front porch, stared up to the sky and realized those numbers would never line up like that again. WOW ! It was amazing. To some this would seem meaningless and probably a bit wacky but I thought it was cool. Shared that moment with my friend B. He's not wacky, but he entertains my wackiness without complaint. Was it worthwhile to him? He would say it makes no difference, because it was worthwhile to me. Not too many people are that giving, but he is one of them.

Goodbye for now

There comes a time, not regulated by the
clock or calendar. March, November, or any
season-only, I suppose, the seasons of the
heart...a time to say goodbye.

There was a time not long ago when we knew
only happiness and brought only love to each
other in every way. Try to think about that.
I know it's dangerous to leave an open door,
but there's always tomorrow.

As long as the heart is capable of remembering,
it's capable of love. Think about the possibility
of tomorrow, even though we've just
now said goodbye.

Tolerance

It rained today. A light drizzly kind. I worked outside all day. In the bad area of town. Houses falling apart, blue tarp covering the roof to stop the rain from coming in. Dogs. Not cute little furry ones. Pitt bulls and Rott's pulling on the chain, with big teeth showing. Barking aggressively, yanking on that small chain held securely in the dirt with that little post. Lurching at you, inches from you, so close the froth from their mouth gets on your pant leg.

God, please don't let this be the time the chain breaks.

I read meters at houses that smell of cat urine, from the outside. Houses where I can hear a mother (who shouldn't be) screaming at her children so loudly I can hear through the wall, kids yelling,"no mom don't hit me, I'll be good." By the time I call the cops, its too late the damage is done. Houses where I know meth people are. Aluminum foil covering the windows. People coming and going. Paranoid people, who come out to see what I am doing, am I a cop? "Oh, its just the Utilities lady". "Your not going to shut my electricity off are you?" "No, I'm just reading the meters." "It's okay man, shes just reading the meters."

One of these days, I'm going to go into a backyard and never come out. Some crack head is going to think I'm a cop and shoot me. Trust me, it will happen.
I've been bit by a dog 5 times already, not by a poodle, but by a Pitt, Rott, German Shepard. They take your flesh between their teeth and shake you like a rag doll, and you think its over. Your heart pounds out of your chest, all you can think about is getting the hell out of there. The last dog bit me in the face. The owner was standing right there. "Shit!" I remember saying, "Am I bleeding?" She's like looking at me, the way you look through a magnifying glass, slowly, peering at me. "Uh, not to bad, just a little bit." I could tell she was lying. It didn't look as bad as I expected, hurt like hell. His tooth went through the bone on the side of my nose. Still hurts to wear sunglasses.

Yeah, rained all day, a light drizzly kind....I hate rain.

Happy May Day!

Yesterday was May 1st. You know, May Day? Does anybody know what May Day is all about? Why have we let this holiday go by the wayside?

Didn't you drive around in the car and run around the neighborhood with hand made May Baskets? You would sneek up to the porch, set your may basket down, ring the bell and run? Your receipent would already be expecting you and chase you down the sidewalk and try to kiss you (boy-girl), or catch you, (boy-boy) (girl-girl).
It was great, and your May basket would have the traditional things, a little popcorn, a few salted peanuts (now eliminated due to peanut allergies), candy corn, and spice drops.

AAAhhh, your smiling aren't you?
Thinking about the May baskets your mom made, huh?

Well forget it! I made 15 construction paper May baskets, cut and folded and glued, they were great (same ones I had as a kid, my mom gave me the pattern). We went from house to house in the car, my son sneeking to the porch, ringing the bell and running. God, it was great!!

The kid answers the door and just looks at us, like why are you ringing my bell and running?
Next house, everybody looked out the window and waved at us, didn't even answer the door.
This went on and on. The few that bothered to come out on the porch, just picked it up and went in, with this puzzled look, like why are you running and driving away in such a hurry?

They don't god damn get it.

My son's kindergarten class did not know what a May pole was....What is wrong with this generation, the thrill is gone, the chase is gone.
All but one girl...Allie. She knew what to do and it was a great chase, with her dad cheering her on, but she wasn't fast enough.
Allie's mom told me they had not thought about May Day this year because Grandma had passed away recently and she always made the coolest, prettiest, most original May baskets. She was able to describe them well. I said, "She had to leave a pattern for one someplace didn't she?" "No" she said. All she had was the memory of them.

Don't let this holiday disappear.
Remember to save the pattern for the next people.